Monday, August 31, 2009

At least it isn't the Mad Hatter Tea Cups...

I've described this journey as an on-going roller-coaster, and that's where I find myself this week. In my most recent meeting with Dr. Chang, we discussed the results of the Pet/CT completed about ten days ago. Here's what the diagnostic report stated:

"The liver demonstrates evidence of progressive metastasis with an increase in number, size and metabolic activity of focal lesions...."

It then goes on to describe various sizes, locations and the amount of "light" given off by the metabolic activity for the various tumors in my liver. I don't know how to quantify the metabolic activity, but it is the level of "light" demonstrated by the organs when they run the nuclear sugar through my body for the PET scan.

In brief, then, I'm back in the lion's den. I'll visit with the interventional radiologist in the next two weeks to determine which pathway is medically indicated. The options will be another couple of sessions like I had last spring, with the directed infusions...or perhaps another plan of attack that brings in the nuclear weapons. Y-Trium -90 beads would be directly injected into my liver, and radiate the bad guys. Dr, Chang continues to emphasize the importance of this effort being limited to my liver, and reinforces that we don't see any challenges in other organs. He likes to have some set of good news plans, I think, and that's his positive mantra for me.

We'll make a game plan, I'll continue to stay in touch, and we'll move forward on the roller coaster. As evidence of my positive outlook, in case anyone thinks I may remain in the dumper for too long…

***I’m ordering new Callaway irons this week, the benefit of the Miners’ Jubilee victory. (This will be the second set of brand new clubs I've ever used, the first coming as a benefit of my promotion to officer status at Standard in 1992.)

***I spent much of the weekend working on the wine cellar in my basement, clearing room for more bottles of the good stuff.

***I’m planning week-end vacation trips with Jillian in October and November.

Work is good, I feel really well...which is part of the disappointment. One would think I'd start feeling badly if something was really going on, and I don't notice a difference. A little less appetite, but that's probably from the mental stress and anxiety, nothing physical.

I'll keep doing the things that make me feel well. Judy was a trooper, as always, in our conversations. I have an incredibly patient, and encouraging, care team around me that makes a difference. This clearly isn’t news one should gloss over, but at the same time I’m not looking deeply into a cavern and wondering…I’m trying to shine a light back into the dark and know for sure where I’m headed.


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